I was diagnosed with “atypical anorexia”. All clinical therapeutic approaches were failing on me. Finally I was given up for dead by doctors as a hopeless case.
My thesis: There’s no such a thing as incurable mental illness, there’s only incompetent doctors and therapists. This is my perspective on ED therapy: (TRIGGER WARNING)
Finding the causes vs fighting the symptoms
Anorexia/bulimia nervosa might be the unsolved riddle of modern medicine and is considered by many physicians as an incurable disease, as no pharmacological therapy shows results and other therapies are not very successful either.
Central in the development of eating disorders is early childhood trauma. The common clinical therapeutic methods – force and behavior therapies – are ineffective, as they only address the symptoms, but ignore the cause. The focus is put on changing specific attitudes and eating patterns, suppressing memories at the same time. These kinds of therapies can be cruel and potentially re-traumatize the victims. Talk therapy does not reach the implicit memory in the right brain and is therefore not suitable for trauma patients either.
Products of imagination?
In 1980 the leading textbook of U.S. psychiatry still claimed that incest happened to fewer than 1 in a million women, and that it’s impact was not particularly damaging.
“In my experience, almost everyone with bulimia (and most with anorexia) have sexual trauma in their past.
Eating disorders are quite literally, “I WILL CONTROL WHAT GOES INTO MY BODY!”
Many people do not have the memories and some of them never recover them.” (quote by a recovered bulimic)
Very seldom, scientists, psychologists, pedagogues, physicians and judges were defending the victim. Rather they were occupied proving the victims to be lying, fantasizing, or actually wanting it themselves. They were part of society’s denial system and got even paid for it.
“Within the medical profession, denial persists even in the presence of incontrovertible physical evidence, such as venereal disease in children. Rather than acknowledge the possibility of sexual abuse, physicians have been known to assert that children can contract venereal disease from clothing, towels or toilet seats.“ (Judith Herman 1980)
“According the conviction of about two thirds of psychotherapeutical experts questioned in 1999 are their clients’ accounts an indication of a fantasy product, if they attribute guilt to the perpetrator, or are very certain this occurrence actually happened. This makes a grotesque level of confusion obvious within the psychotherapeutic profession.”
The reality looks very different:
“The significance of sexual conflicts in many patients with eating disorders has been well documented. However, even when these have been considered to have some degree of etiological importance, the occurrence of actual sexual trauma or incest in the early lives of these patients has been generally neglected in the literature. At one point in time, it was noted that five of six patients on an inpatient unit for eating disorders revealed an early history of sexual abuse or incest.” 
As Hilde Bruch (1982) pointed out, anorexia nervosa often occurs after a film showing or a lesson on sex education.
Trivial scientific studies
Despite decades of failure scientists are still looking for organic causes. As an example I give a study of Charité’s (Germany’s largest and most prestigious hospital) psychologist, for which she was awarded a doctor title.
evaluated differently: averse stimuli were evaluated as more unpleasant as neutral stimuli, positive stimuli more pleasant than neutral stimuli. In analogue, it showed a higher level of fear in all groups at averse stimuli than at neutral/positive stimuli, as a lower level of fear at positive stimuli compared with negative stimuli.”
rate variability, and looks inside the brain chemistry (too high serotonin level) for the cause of AN. At least in her publications she tries to explain the disease with the biomedical model, being in line with psychiatry, which denies, ignores or neglects psycho-social-cultural causes of mental “diseases”.
Eating disorders research is very under-funded. The National Institute of Health allocates only 93 cents towards research funding for every person diagnosed with an eating disorder. In comparison, they give $88 for every person diagnosed with autism. This is painfully low.
“Additionally in ED biological changes occur, like neurotransmitter disorders, metabolic and hormonal dysfunction, disordered hunger- and satiety feeling. However, we are not certain if this changes are cause or effect of ED.“
“For once it is questioned, in how far specific observed traits during an acute AN correlates of the underweight are, or rather represent independent traits (hen or egg, state or trait)”
A long-term ED patients, who spent more than one year involuntarily in the Charité, suffered an additional trauma from the repulsive hospital food.I myself had many (not ED) room mates who lost weight because of the inedible food. They at least had the option to supply themselves, ED patients are not allowed to buy their own food.
with aspartame (highly neurotoxic!).
Accumulating evidence suggests that frequent consumers of these sugar substitutes may also be at increased risk of excessive weight gain, metabolic syndrome, type 2 diabetes, and cardiovascular disease" (that’s why it’s used for industrial animal fattening).
dietary guidelines for the treatment of AN of the Charité 5 times the importance of low-fat food is emphasized, thereby reinforcing the irrational fat phobia of anorexics: this is an unabridged translation:
2. Plenty of grain products - and potatoes
Bread, pasta, rice, cereal flakes (...) and potatoes contain hardly any fat, but plenty of vitamins, minerals as well as fiber and secondary plant substances. Consume these foods with low-fat ingredients.
4. Daily milk and milk products; fish once or twice a week; Meat, sausages and eggs in moderation. (…) Prefer low-fat products, especially meat and dairy products.
5. Low fat and high-fat foods
7. Abundant fluid Water is absolutely vital. Drink around 1.5 liters of fluid every day. Do you prefer non-carbonated water and other low-calorie drinks (…) ***
8. Prepare tasty and gentle Cook the respective dishes at the lowest possible temperatures, as short as possible, with little water and little fat - this preserves the natural taste, protects the nutrients and prevents the formation of harmful compounds.
These are double-bind messages. One hand hand, anorexics are told they need to eat more, on the other hand that low-fat and low-calorie is a good thing, leaving them utterly confused. The amount of calories or fat of a food makes no statement about it’s health value.
From own experiences I know the torture of blood sugar fluctuations if you are extremely emaciated. A high fat diet would ensure a stable blood sugar. Dr. Berg even recommends a ketogenic diet (obviously for AN recovery this is too restrictive as well as IF).
During the 2nd world war, unwanted children were put on a low fat diet by Nazi doctors, because thus they sooner starved to death ("Euthanasia").
In the Charité low-fat dairy products are being served to ED patients, which is neither suitable for weight gain, nor weight loss, there is also an issue with calcium absorption.
Antidepressants, serotonin and weight-gain
depressions. Conversely, anorexics show an abnormal high serotonin level. Antidepressants'(SSRI) mechanism is to raise the serotonin level.
Increased serotonin activity may be associated with certain characteristics, such as: Food restriction and rigid, inhibited, anxious and compulsive behavior, such as occur in anorexia.
Neither in a state of acute hunger nor as prophylaxis after weight rehabilitation has medication with serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) shown a positive effect on eating disorder symptoms, depression or obsessive-compulsive symptoms in patients with AN ", write Dr. med. Katharina Bühren and Prof. Dr. med. Beate Herpertz-Dahlmann.
Researchers are still puzzled as to why, if anorexics already have high levels of serotonin, then SSRIs (medications like Prozac which raise serotonin levels) are successful treatments for some individuals.
Body Mass Index
An obese woman not losing weight was blamed for not eating sufficient calories. In fact it was the hospital food, I would have put her on a healthy (not calorie-restricted) diet for weight-loss.
“Anorexia was also interpreted in the context of instinctive theory analyzes from the point of view of oedipal conflicts: Oedipal conflicts, i.e. conflicts due to a failed identification process with one's own gender identity, therefore determine the symptomatic behavior of anorexics, understood as an oral form of conception phobia. However, this theory is to be assessed as insufficient for the occurrence of anorexia nervosa, especially since it cannot explain the steadily increasing rate of illnesses despite information and increasing emancipation. Based on FREUD's comments on the death instinct, HANS WILLENBERG interprets the anorectic as well as the bulimic symptom formation as an auto-destructive behavior disorder in the sense of an uninhibited form of the death instinct. Seen this way, anorexia stands for a rebellion against biological laws, for a game with death, which - including the urge for autonomy - forms the flip side of the desire for security and protection.”
etic understanding has to be compensated with violence.
Constraint a necessity?
ED clinics you are forced to eat up by threat of punishment, sometimes even on the first day which is health-damaging from a physiologically perspective. One awful clinic I left after a few days was named after goddess Ananke.
Constraint is no necessity for ED!
In 2004, a German court awarded €200,000 compensation for pain and suffering to an anorexia patient who had been subjected to force-treatment.
One of the reasons was:"The cure of their illness is only through long-term psychosomatic treatment and not by
means of coercive measures were expected."
Only by coerced eating in therapy many anorexics turn from the restrictive into the purging
studies have shown that stealth increases as the pressure and coercion on those with eating disorders increase.
Cognitive Behavior Therapy or symptom shifting
Cognitive Behavior Therapy is said to be moderately successful.
“Conversely, criticisms of behavioral therapy relate to symptom-relatedness. Certainly, learning theoretical conceptions hold potential in psychological behavior research, but they always fall short if they ignore a holistic experience and events. In addition, even with so-called “cognitive deficits” it is necessary to ask in what overall context they are to be seen and whether a purely cognitive view of this phenomenon offers sufficient explanation. Do you not have to ask what “meaning”(understood in an overall context) is denial? It suggests that another method is being sought with the method presented below in order to explore the phenomenon of anorexia and make them understandable.”
Indoctrination and self-deception
I do not assume that most doctors and therapists are malevolent, but all have been through lifelong indoctrination, and very few people have the ability to question given circumstances and authorities. And like those with ED, they are very good at lying to themselves. They know that they cannot change the system. Even though they recognize many grievances, they are repressing it out of opportunism.
gives only the illusion to heal people. A hospital is in the red very quickly if it cannot manage to occupy all beds. Sustainably healed patients would mean bankruptcy.
Hidden realities of our society
Institutional psychiatry and psychology also serve to prevent social realities such as pedophilia and ritual abuse from being fully publicized. The perpetrators are in influential positions. While new clinical diagnoses are devised almost every day in order to be able to prescribe even more medication, in DSM 5 pedophilia was originally no longer classified as a paraphilia, but rather as a “sexual orientation” so as not to stigmatize those affected. When there was an outcry at the change, it was referred to as a “typographical error.”
There is an agenda to make pedophilia / hebephilia socially acceptable. In the 1980s there were movements (the Green Party and others) that advocated the legalization of sex with children. When this approach failed, more subtle methods were adopted:
In 2007 two brochures were published by the Federal Center for Health Education, “Body, Love, Doctor Games” , here are some excerpts:
“The vagina and especially the clitoris receive little attention due to naming and tender touch (neither by the father nor the mother) and make it more difficult for the girl to develop pride in her sexuality.”
“Sometimes trigger feelings of excitement in adults.”
“It is a sign of the healthy development of your child if he makes extensive use of the opportunity to create pleasure and satisfaction for himself.”
If girls ( 1 - 3 years!) rather use objects to help you, then you should not use it as an excuse to prevent masturbation. Would take a look at this information leaflet and be inspired - please feel everyone addressed!”
In the “Guide for parents on child sexual development from the age of 4 to 6 years” the parents are informed that “genital games at this age are signs of a well-progressing psychosexual development”, that masturbation should be supported and everyone else Forms of sexual games, such as “imitation of the sexual act” and “the desire to retreat in secrecy” .
In technical terms, 93 percent of the educators give a positive opinion. The brochure is rated as informative, factually sound and comprehensive.
A good example are the theses of the renowned psychiatrist Otto Kernberg, who is not criticized in public by his peers:
A primary school student therefore experiences the rape by her father as a “sexually exciting triumph over her mother” ; in doing so, she is charged with “(oedipal) guilt” which she later has to “tolerate” ; her feeling of triumph is initially “unconscious” to her; and only a trained psychoanalyst like Otto Kernberg knows how to decode her unconscious impulses, the job of psychoanalysis is to make her aware of her old messes, which should help her to deal with her own misdemeanors, so she can finally experience herself as the perpetrator and leave the role of victim: With the magic word “unconsciously” psychoanalysis has been complacently trying for over 100 years to immunize its unfortunate pseudo-argumentation against any contradiction and criticism from outside.
Kernberg sees the (supposedly) fruitful result of his work with this victim of early childhood experience of sexualised violence as follows: “This gave her the ability to identify with the perpetrator, namely the sexual arousal of the sadistic, incestuous father, and so it became also possible to combine hatred of the father with understanding his sexual and their sexual behavior.”
"The French physician Alfred Fournier wrote that it was the "devious cunning of the simulators and the heartbreaking despair of their victims [that forced him] to denounce such monstrosities and expose them to outrage." The word "victim" is used here to refer to the man who was accused of rape. For F., the accused perpetrator's speech in itself, the fact that he vehemently denies the rape, already serves as evidence of the man's innocence. Here the exposure and speaking out of the victims of sexual violence is transformed into evidence of their own morbidity.”
Blind belief in authority
Although pedophilia causes outrage in most people, it is received completely differently when it comes from an authoritarian source in a deceptive packaging, almost 90% of parents reacted positively to the above brochure! Authoritarianism is very dangerous, the Milgram experiment has shown that the majority of people are even ready to torture and kill innocent people if someone in a white coat orders them to.
Dissidents and non-conformists who criticize the system are silenced. Last year, in a psychiatric report, I was declared “mentally disturbed" to discredit me, possibly intending to lock me up again.
Genes to blame or who?
Belief in the genetic etiology of an illness leads to self-surrender because neither doctors nor you can change your own genes. A biological determinism of a disease can lead to those affected being evaluated more unpredictable, dangerous, fundamentally different or incurable.
Most recently, researchers identified the “anorexia gene” . From a DIE WELT article:
Genetic cause can exonerate anorexics
These discoveries could “permanently change” the previous understanding of anorexia, explained Anke Hinney from the Clinic for Psychiatry, Psychosomatics and Psychotherapy of Childhood and Adolescence at the UDE. “A psychiatric disorder with a physiological background opens up completely new and previously unexpected treatment ”.“In addition, the genetic cause can relieve those affected. The research results were published in the specialist journal “The American Journal of Psychiatry”
Here again it is implied that those with a non-genetic (or non-neurological) cause are themselves to blame for their illness.
A survey among medical staff has shown that patients with anorexia nervosa are perceived unpleasant, often consider the disease to be self-inflicted, and think that patients should exercise more self-control.
Highlights of studies of inexperienced clinicians and trainees revealed:
Again and again the ambivalence of health care professionals becomes apparent, who on the one hand see AN justified by a biologically based diagnosis, on the other hand accuse the affected (from a psychoanalytic point of view) of being responsible for their own suffering. AN or BN cannot be grasped intellectually.
“Whether bulimia (bulimia nervosa) or anorexia (anorexia nervosa), those affected have attitudes and perceptions
that are irrational and distorted " The behavior of anorexics and bulimics is not irrational, but arational, and is therefore not understandable for
doctors and psychologists who are caught in a worldview ruled by scientism.
Self-fulfilling prophecies and nocebos
The diagnosis of an incurable disease leads to a state of hopelessness and apathy in most people and often ends in death, regardless of the diagnosis' validity. This phenomenon is called nocebo (opposite of placebo)
Deep Brain Stimulation - lobotomy in disguise
A new trend in anorexia therapy is deep brain stimulation, in which electrodes are inserted 15 cm deep into the brain. Don't be tricked by false promises of a miracle cure into such foolishness. 70 years ago, doctors were still enthusiastic about lobotomy (in which brain pieces are being cut out), there were "therapeutic successes", and even a Nobel Prize was awarded. Neither the cause nor the solution to your problems lies in your brain!
“The problem with deep brain stimulation is that we are actually fishing in murky waters because we don't know where exactly to intervene. Each of the studies available so far has chosen a different stimulation location. Experience in Parkinson's patients has shown that DBS is very susceptible to placebo effects. In my opinion, the patients from the Canadian study did not gain weight because electrodes stimulated any center in their brain, but because they regularly went to therapy afterwards.” Prof. Dr. Martina de Zwaan
This woman gained 100 lbs after her brain surgery (lobotomy)and lost her humanity.
Hospitalism - multiple types of deprivation
One of the reasons why I almost died in therapy and many others are being unresponsive to psychiatric treatment is that the cold hospital environment is the most unfavorable place to cure eating disorders, as demonstrated by an experiment on home children (1940):
The children reacted to the mother's deprivation with symptoms of" an increasingly severe deterioration ". The course of the hospital syndrome initially showed the same stages as that of the "anaclitical depression"; they followed each other rapidly. After 3 months the course continued: "The slowdown in motor skills was fully expressed; the children became completely passive; The facial expression became empty and feeble-minded, the coordination of the eyes decreased. ”The average developmental quotient of these children was 45% of the norm at the end of the second year. The decline “first manifests itself in a slowdown in the child's psychological development; then mental dysfunction sets in with somatic changes. In the next stage, this leads to an increased susceptibility to infection and finally, if the lack of affective intake continues into the second year of life, to a noticeable increase in the mortality rate. "Most of the children observed by Spitz at the age of 4 years" could not sit "Stand, run, talk". Of the 90 children, 24 died in the first year of life and 4 died in the second year of life. This high mortality rate is explained by the "total withdrawal of affective intake", from the complete lack of maternal care.
Even if patients with eating disorders are not infants, they react similarly to emotional deprivation. The Charité also ignores the need for human touch. Therapeutic massages are only available for back problems.
Leptin - the ultimate anorexia remedy or just another placebo?
Hyperactivity in many anorexics is associated with low leptin-levels.
I am not an endocrinologist myself, but for me as a layman it would be more obvious that hyperactivity, just like
calorie restriction, is linked to the desire to lose weight or the fear of gaining weight. I (who had no body schema disorder) never felt an urge to move when I was very underweight, on the contrary.
“The effect exceeded our wildest expectations," says Prof. Hebebrand, Medical Director of the Clinic for Psychiatry, Psychosomatics and Psychotherapy of Children and Adolescents at the LVR Clinic in Essen. After just two to three days, the mood of the depressed patients had clearly brightened. In addition, their urge to move decreased, they could concentrate better and would have shown more interest in their surroundings and interacted more socially. Even the eating disorder-specific carousel of thought was alleviated by the administration of leptin. One of the study participants is quoted as saying: "I feel like I'm on vacation from my eating disorder."
One should bear in mind what (placebo) effect it could have if the three participants are told that they have the
privilege of trying out a drug that is a ray of hope for anorexia.
I could imagine that they were suggested a lack of leptin is responsible for their hyperactivity, just as a lack of serotonin would be the cause for
Paradoxically, leptin is also used in the therapy of obesity:
“In the animal model, high leptin levels lead to a reduction in appetite and weight loss, while low leptin levels have the exact opposite effect. So far, leptin has mainly been researched as a potential starting point for the therapy of obesity.“
In another study, increased
leptin levels caused negative symptoms in anorexic patients:
“In HSS (high severity group) [very low BMI] patients, higher leptin levels were associated with greater feelings of depression, anxiety, and stress.“
Hyperactivity is another trauma symptom. The rule with other hunger victims seems to be lethargy:
“One could explain the occurrence of some somatic" lethargy "symptoms under extreme restriction of the food supply in evolutionary terms by saying that urgently needed energy is saved through the restricted movement.“
EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) an alternative?
The present STUDY examined the changes in the attachment state of mind, narrative coherence, and reflective function in a sample of AN patients after about a year of EMDR or CBT psychotherapy. The results presented, despite the small sample size, suggest that EMDR is a valuable effective treatment for ED and AN, in line with other clinical study. Several sources starting from 1980 have reported a net correlation between ED and traumatic experiences. Research has been initially focused on the relation between ED and physical abuses and sexual harassment for the simple correspondence to a parental guidance failure. Recent studies showed that also emotional abuses, repetitive micro‐traumatic relational experiences can result in further traumatic symptomatology.
The hoax of the false memory syndrome
Emotional and sexual abuse can take many forms. The number of unreported cases is always higher than the statistics, very few have memories of early childhood, and particularly traumatic experiences are mostly repressed. If you have been the victim of any form of violence, do not let your therapists convince you that you suffer from false memory syndrome or that you should simply forget everything and adapt to society.
If the gap between the development of eating disorders and occurrence of sexual abuse is very short, subjects may
not be recovered from memories of such a horrible experience. Severity of eating disorders might also affect their
sexual abuse reports. In severe forms of eating disorders, CSA experience may be inaccessible to victims. 
Eating disorders as a denial mechanism
Eating disorders take an immense amount of thought and time. Sometimes thoughts about food or body image are less anxiety-provoking than the events that caused or amplified the level of emotional distress. Worrying about food, exercise, and/or body size is stressful, but for some, it serves as a distraction (consciously or subconsciously) to thoughts or memories that may be more fear-inducing and distressing. In the aftermath of sexual abuse, eating disorders provide relief and protection from what an individual’s mind tells them might be worse. 
MAINTAINING AN ILLUSION OF CONTROL
The "need" for an eating disorder arises from a combination of two factors: too much is out of control; and the other available coping strategies are not up to the challenge. Survivors of childhood sexual abuse had childhoods that were out of control to an extreme degree, and many of these individuals were, in a sense, betrayed by their bodies when the abuse triggered physiologically normal arousal. The horrible, disgusting, depraved body needs to be punished, starved into an asexual, prepubescent state, and disconnected from the head so that no physiological arousal of any kind enters consciousness, whether it be fear or sexual arousal. 
ED and homosexuality
In a study on this topic, 53% of all boys and men with eating disorders were homosexual. This is a huge amount when you realize that the overall frequency of homosexuality is only 1-5%. The causes of this connection are unclear, at least from a scientific point of view. As a possible reason, psychologists cite that homosexuality more often leads to conflicts with oneself, which can prepare the ground for anorexia.
The explanation is that homosexuality is also often caused by sexual abuse.
Many studies agree anxiety is extremely pervasive in cases of anorexia. The study by Kaye et. al. included nearly 700 individuals (some with anorexia, some with bulimia, and others with both eating disorders) and found about two-thirds of them had an with obsessive compulsive disorder being the most common (41%).
ED patients often have further additional diagnoses such as depression, borderline, personality disorders or self-harming behavior. In reality, these are not independent psychological disorders (which, by chance, often occur together), but only different symptoms from a single, very complex clinical picture that is associated with psychological trauma.
“Such patients typically receive five or six unrelated diagnoses during the course of their psychiatric treatment. If their doctor focus on their mood swings, they will be identified as bipolar and get prescribed lithium or valproate. If the professionals are most impressed with their despair, they will be told they are suffering from a major depression and given antidepressants. If the doctors focus on their restlessness and lack of attention, they may be identified as ADHD and treated with Ritalin or other stimulants. If the clinic staff happens to take a trauma hjstory, and the patient volunteers the relevant information, he or she might receive the diagnosis PTSD. None of these diagnoses will be completely off the mark, and none of them will begin to meaningful describe who these patients are and what they suffer from.” (Van der Kolk 2014)
Developmental Trauma Disorder (DTD) as a new diagnosis?
In absence of a sensitive trauma-specific diagnosis, such children are currently diagnosed with an average of 3-8 co-mordi disorders. The continued practice of applying multiple distinct co-morbid diagnoses to traumatized children has grave consequences: it defies parsimony, obscures etiological clarity, and runs danger of relegating treatment and intervention to a small aspect of the child‘s psychopathology rather than promoting a comprehensive treatment approach.“
In a letter to the APA: „We urge the APA to add developmental trauma to its list of priority areas to clarify and better characterize its course and clinical sequelae and to emphasize the strong need to adress developmental trauma in the assessment of patients.“
As a reply they wrote that „the consensus was that no new diagnosis was required to fill a missing diagnostic niche.“
One million children who are abused and neglected every year in the US a “diagnostic niche“?
The letter went on: „The notion that early childhood adverse experiences lead to substantial developmental disruptions is more clinical intuition that a research-based fact.“ (Van der Kolk 2014)
The downside of subjective diagnoses
The diagnosis of mental “illnesses” is not objective and very vague. A disadvantage is social stigmatization, another danger is identification with the diagnosis. Patients often unconsciously behave according to their diagnosis. In the worst case, it can lead to groups like PRO ANA.
“The current diagnostic criteria according to DSM-IV (refusal to maintain normal weight) and ICD-10 (the weight loss is self-induced) imply a voluntary act by the patient and could therefore favor such accusations of guilt.”
It's not about thinness
“Exposure to this ideal [of thinness] is ubiquitous, but everybody doesn’t get anorexia nervosa,” Bulik says. “None of the sociocultural literature has ever been able to explain why.” She adds, “A lot of patients will say, ‘It was never about being thin for me, ever.’”
“If you look at psychiatric syndromes over 200 years, anorexia hasn’t changed at all,” whereas our culture has, says James Lock, a child psychiatrist.
A deadly punishment
There was a girl starving to death from a neuropathic gut disorder, everybody was pitying her. So it was tolerated I gave her massages. There was also an anorexic woman, at the beginning down to 45 pounds, who had be rejected by everyone all her life for her ugly looks. She expressed the wish to have a massage, too. This time it was not tolerated by the head physician, we got both kicked out as a punishment. She gave herself up and didn’t want to go into therapy anymore and died. My own conditions deteriorated and my relationship to the doctors was broken.
These strict rules and the punishment were meant to protect us (rape and false accusations of rape). The staff was projecting their own hypersexuality, anorexics don't show much in interest in sex, the higher is their need for non-sexual touch.
“I was literally repeatedly sexually assaulted in a psychiatric ward where staff had access to sedative type drugs and opiate type drugs and long night shifts that have opportunity.” ( a ritual abuse survivor"s experience)
Body contact is strictly forbidden even among female patients, hugs are tolerated at best. Friendships among the patients are said to be of disadvantage, since they should “concentrate on themselves.”
with diving suits have shown that anorexics start eating again when they feel they are being held.
So-called consequences (operant conditioning)
If an anorexic doesn’t reach the weight goal (at least 1.1 pounds/week) the blame is always put on the patient. An athletic and physical active girl didn’t manage to gain weight with the calculated amount of calories and was unjustly punished. This was emotional abuse, afterwards she lay curled up crying on the floor, and had to secretively eat sweets in order to gain weight. She had been too honest to drink water prior to the weighing. Another inpatient drank so much water in order to reach the weight goal, she had to be rushed to intensive care. Punishments are euphemistically called “consequences”. In contrast, the other kind of “consequences” (rewards) are not really worthwhile for an anorexic (e.g. allowance to buy some ice-cream).
Voluntary weight contracts?
A consequence for not meeting the weight goal can be confinement to the ward for weeks, which is very detrimental to health, as sun and fresh air is essential.
Therapists want to trick patients into believing they are signing this contract voluntarily. However, it’s indirect coercion, if you don’t comply you are getting kicked out even sooner for not cooperating.
While one is not very imaginative with forms of therapy, the more importance is attached to weight gain. Patients are being weighed daily in many clinics.
Very often, patients are coerced into tube-feeding. There are only economic reasons for these measures, because in this way the discharge weight can be reached in a shorter time. Artificial feeding does not have any therapeutic value. Exclusively artificial feeding (like in my case) is even detrimental to curing an ED. For this, health risks are accepted and pain and discomfort through the tube.
“You’re telling me that you’ve got a patient with a history of sexual abuse – lots of them do, at this point, yeah? – and then you get a load of strangers pile into their bedroom, hold her down and shove something in them against their will – it’s hard to feel like you’re doing a good job there, you know?”
“I definitely felt with some patients, just ship them out to palliative care or something you know? We could be helping others, but we were locked in this cycle of mutual abuse, them of us, us of them, and no one won. It just felt pointless.”
“At no point have we been trained what to do – no one knows the best way, safest way to do it, we all just find what works and do it, but it always feels so risky you know? If there was a specific ‘this is how you restrain and tube feed’ course, then great, we’re doing the right thing, but there’s not.”
“It leaves us terribly open, professionally. If you have to use five staff to hold down a patient, get a tube down, pass the feed down, and they’re fighting it, it’s violent. It’s tough. If someone gets hurt can we say we did it by the book, safely? Well - there is no book. It’s unsafe for all of us.”
“I’m supposed to be caring for them – and I’m fighting, literally fighting. And you know their history and it impacts on you. You feel abusive. Tainted.”
“I think they [the patients] perceive you differently too – even the patients who are informal, there to recover. They know what you’re doing and it makes them wary of you too, I think. You’re no longer a nurse to them either – you’re also…I don’t know, a combatant, a…a guard. It just creates barriers, everywhere.”
“I’ve had nightmares about tubing, really intense dreams, you just can’t switch off from it”
Tube feeding and formula drinks essential?
When I was hospitalized 2016 in life-threatening conditions, no doctor believed I would survive. In addition they had the conviction artificial tube feeding and formula drinks were essential for the survival of AN patients.
Knowing the truth and how my body functioned, I refused it, and gained in a short time 45 pounds on regular hospital food, a weight gain that was unseen on artificial feeding. All other AN patients get edemas (not only related to protein deficiencies), I didn’t.
If they want to optimize weight gain, why would ED patients get such crappy food (e.g. unripe fruit)?
When it was decided to force-feed me to break my resistance, my psychiatrist Dr. Sänger wanted to do everything right. Because the medical literature warns against refeeding syndrome, I was started with a calorie intake of 600 kcal (ignoring the fact that I had previously eaten almost 2000 kcal. Because the exact number of calories could only be determined with formula food, I was denied all natural food for months!)
Six years later, the first paradigm shift has occurred, the fear of refeeding syndrome was recognized by doctors as unfounded. An electrolyte imbalance can easily be prevented with phosphate supplementation, or a different diet:
“Of course, the conservative approach leads to slow weight gain, longer hospital stays and possibly also to medical complications." Dr. Verena Haas
In the future, the weekly weight gain will no longer be limited to 0.5-1.0 kg. There will also be a paradigm shift in synthetic liquid foods, and I hope Dr. Haas is rethinking her "low-fat" nutritional guidelines.
“There are no studies of food composition at all. From a scientific point of view, therefore, no advantage of certain combinations can be proven.” Dr. Verena Haas
Who's susceptible for ED?
Veganism/Vegetarianism an ED?
Categorizing veganism as an eating disorder is a mechanism of self-justification for (meat-eating) doctors and therapists. Many health professionals consider veganism as a trait of narcissism, not compassion.
Families are never responsible?
These 9 so called truths are the best proof how all leading organizations are in denial of childhood trauma by saying:
How could anyone disagree with Keanu? I don‘t think he was picked for Truth #2 by chance.
Severe cases of anorexia get sometimes treated with electroconvulsive therapy (ECT)in which are electrically induced by electrodes to the head. Without muscle relaxants the seizures would break bones. There is no scientific explanation how it benefits the patients, except losing temporarily some painful memories. It can (and will) give you permanent brain damage. Inspiration for this "therapy" were sedated pigs in a slaughterhouse.
“I'd rather have a small lobotomy than a series of electroconvulsive shocks… I just know what the brain looks like after a series of shocks — and it's not very pleasant to look at." Karl H. Pribram, professor of psychology and psychiatry at Stanford University
Anorexia Nervosa Inventory for Self-Rating (ANIS)
The ANIS has 14 questions that are not food-related:
These four questions suggest that ES is a suppression mechanism for trauma.
- I can't stand boredom.
- I feel dull and empty.
- I am tense and restless.
- It's hard for me to sit around and do nothing.
These three questions indicate sexual trauma.
- I am uncomfortable seeing others in sexual arousal.
- I'm afraid of kissing.
- I am very afraid of intimate relationships.
These questions also indicate trauma.
- I feel inferior and helpless inside.
- There is no point in me struggling to achieve something in life,
since all my efforts and efforts do not change anything.
- I have many requirements that I find difficult to meet.
- I feel restricted by the expectations of others.
Perfectionism is also an indication of trauma.
- When I start something, I need to do everything perfectly and accurately.
- Compared to others, I am very conscientious and thorough in everything I do.
It is not uncommon for forced group activities to give the impression that group therapy is a type of comprehensive psychological sausage machine that, regardless of what is thrown into it, produces a satisfactory result. The rigidity of doctor-centered forms of treatment seems to have been exchanged only for the tyranny of the group as an end in itself.
Most of the patients I know were annoyed by group therapy.. I myself was often bored to death. It happened that
there was a dead silence for 15 minutes.
In some cases health care professionals overlook organic causes (e.g. hormonal or GI) for an anorexia symptomology.
A young man with a long history of obsessional traits and food fads presented with anorexia, vomiting and marked weight loss. He showed little concern for his physical state and his vomiting was frequently witnessed as self-induced. A diagnosis of anorexia nervosa was made and he took his own discharge from hospital. He was readmitted one month later, severely cachectic and with biochemical abnormalities consistent with advanced Addison's disease which was subsequently confirmed. He responded dramatically, both mentally and physically, to corticosteroid therapy. It is likely that anorexia nervosa, relatively rare in males, was a manifestation of the psychological abnormalities commonly seen in severe Addison's disease.
Ibogaine for Eating Disorders
Many people who are binge eaters, anorexic or bulimic have had traumatic experiences take place in their lives that were never addressed or fully dealt with and that's what triggered their eating disorder. iBogaine is different from other conventional methods used to treat eating disorders. One of the greatest effects of ibogaine is that it will clear the neural pathways which constituent negative behavioural patterns such as depression. But it will leave the positive ones. In other words, ibogaine resets your neurotransmitter mechanisms, which re-balances your neurotransmitters. How Iboga Heals Eating Disorders with Karen O'Neel
Yoga for Eating Disorders
Teaching those who are in conflict with their physical selves – that there are other aspects of self they can identify with (an energetic body, a witness body and even the pure consciousness of their True Self) – is exceptionally healing. It is often the first step to feeling at home in our physical bodies, and the first step in trusting our feelings and our own unique experiences in the world.
Physically, yoga can be tailored to support digestion, relieve constipation and reduce reactivity around the painful process of refeeding. Emotionally, yoga supports a connection with internal resources so that feelings, needs and longings are grounded. With a design that first “opens” the body through stretching and ends with relaxation, stressful thought patterns that perpetuate eating disorders can often fade (at least temporarily). Sometimes, emotions that have burdened us for years are able to be released during or after a yoga practice.
A STUDY concluded that yoga could be effective in the treatment of ED.
Equine-assisted therapy for Eating Disorders
Horses are congruent in what they are feeling internally at all times and do not pretend to be something they are not. They are authentic and relate to each other honestly and truthfully and embody their experiences. They naturally live in the here-and-now. They do not worry about what might happen next or what has happened in the part. This focus on the here-and-now becomes a particularly powerful way of relating to reality because many clients with eating disorders focus on the source of their anxiety in their inner worlds and oftentimes struggle to live their life authentically.
An eating disordered mankind
As a result of civilization, everyone is eating disordered, i. e. eats (or starves) at times for emotional reasons and not for biological needs.
Experts and the Dunning-Kruger-Effect
probably no other field, authorities are as incapable and misinformed as in nutrition science and health care in general. The average anorexic has more nutritional knowledge than a clinical nutritionist.
tudies have shown
that lay therapists are more effective than professional therapists.
"...but memory is not necessary to heal. All that matters is that the trauma be released. Not to focus on it forever but to examine it, release it, be aware in the future when you are triggered by events of the past and allow yourself healthy nourishment. It is the ultimate act of self-love.“ by Karen
I feel from decades of seeing others in therapy, as a buddy, with disorders of all sorts, including eating ones that large amounts of so called "diagnosed" differences are rooted in eiher very early birth/attachment/feeding/maternal disorders and or later serial trauma which may be more subtle and deep - such as not being "filled properly with attention or love" across time .."Fill me in please" .. In others words unmet needs across time ... Sadly it's not possible for many people to grow up properly without coming through the codified messes of their own parents emotional lives and various denials of needs and the baggages that made them like that .. Crucially it is possible to re-feel and re-engage damages like unmet needs/trauma and mourn these things so that "loss of being filled in" or sickness of being "filled in wrongly" in various ways can be grieved ...It's a complex matter but it can be addressed by deep empathic therapy that at it's heart regains back the true emotional narratives the poor patient went through ..- Rabz De Rivers
Holly, a young woman whose father successfully sued her therapists didn’t like pickles, whole bananas, mayonnaise, cream soups, melted cheese or white sauce. According to her therapists, her eating habits were compelling evidence, that her father forced oral sex on her as a child, because pickles and bananas are penis-shaped, and mayonnaise, cream soups and white sauce resemble semen.
In addition, she entered therapy with a full-blown eating disorder. She was bulimic, eating large amounts of food, and then vomiting in a terrible binge/purge cycle.
Many therapists considered eating disorders a nearly fool-proof symptom of childhood incest. Holly’s therapist told her that 80% of all eating disordered patients had been sexually abused.
Yet there is no scientific evidence that eating disorders stem from childhood molestation as Harvard psychiatrists Harrison Pope and James Hudson, experts in the field repeatedly stressed. “Current evidence does not support the hypothesis that childhood abuse is a risk factor for bulimia nervosa”, they wrote in a 1992 article in the American Journal of Psychiatry.
I haven't bothered listing most cited resources, as they are translations from German.
This was my first insight into how our health care system is unprepared to treat eating disorder survivors, a travesty compounded by society’s rigid physical ideals for women. Survivors could best be served by the development of new treatment options targeted at modifying harmful behaviors and by eroding patriarchal visions of the female body. Instead, we are treated like social outliers who are shamed and told we have taken things too far. Denying the existence of sexism is a historically convenient method of the ignorant, and to tell an eating disorder survivor that our plight is of self-creation is to validate the disproportionate and unrealistic physical expectations for women that have permeated every aspect of society.
I will never forget the first time I saw my own reflection without wanting to see less of it. It took years for me to regain control of my life and body, both of which deserved respect and love after having spent years as a battleground. Sharing my story was the first step toward total recovery and remains my personal form of resistance. By speaking out, we can reduce the shame and stigma associated with eating disorders and give courage to millions of survivors. —Jaclyn Munson